


your identity, my future

by its_a_banana



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Birthday Celebrations, Character Study, Confessions, Fluff, Identity, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan & Mark Lee Are Best Friends, Lovesick, M/M, Mark Lee (NCT) is Whipped, NCT 127 Ensemble-centric, Nakamoto Yuta is Whipped, Relationship Study, Sweet, Yumark - Freeform, a little smut yas, happy birthday yuta!!, pure fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:55:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27204866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/its_a_banana/pseuds/its_a_banana
Summary: It was not a strange question. He could have quickly answered it over slurred words and pumping feelings.And then, Donghyuck had to go and pulled up the same question on him, but Mark hears a different implication on his tone. He smirks, "So hyung, who is Nakamoto Yuta for you?"Who is Nakamoto Yuta for Mark Lee? He weighs the answer.
Relationships: Mark Lee/Nakamoto Yuta
Comments: 13
Kudos: 132





	your identity, my future

**Author's Note:**

> first of all, happy birthday to our osaka prince, our angel, nakamoto yuta!! i love u so much yutaaa ♡♡  
> so i wrote this quickly because i had this prompt before i went to bed last night  
> this is my very self-indulgent fluff yumark au  
> happy reading ♡♡

It shouldn't trigger Mark as it should. It was not a strange question. He could have quickly answered it over slurred words and pumping feelings.

He is tipsy, had a bottle of beer already. What's the occasion? Well, it's the birthday of the subject of the conversation with his best friend. A significant and blissful day, Mark keeps smiling earlier as soon as the clock strike midnight.

Half an hour ago, he was chatting with Donghyuck over the various amount of foods. They have celebrated Yuta's birthday right after their schedules. And while Yuta just came back from his birthday v-live held at the company, the members busied themselves preparing for the party.

They surprised him with a well-prepared decorated dorm as Yuta came back home and smiles at the commotion.

It was warming and still. Celebrating birthdays together with their beloved friends with whom they've shared the same dreams is one of the most incredible things ever. However, Mark thought, celebrating it with your _special someone_ made it a million times better.

In Mark's argument, as Yuta's boyfriend, he had been the first one to greet the older a 'happy birthday' at midnight and kissing him full and lovingly. Mark finds himself blushing as the older proceeded to ravish Mark's lips and, thank god he has no on-cam schedules for his neck, is smothered with love bruises, courtesy of the Japanese man.

Everything is going so well, Yuta is happy, so Mark is also pleased. Enjoying the party on the 10th floor, Yuta and the older ones are playing a game in the living room while he and Donghyuck are munching on the foods. Oh, how tables have turned, isn't it?

Then, Donghyuck raised a statement after gulping a can of soda. "Just so you know, Taeil hyung is sleeping in my room tonight."

Mark turned to him, "What?"

The other rolled his eyes, "He said he doesn't want to hear your moans anymore. Seeing that it's Yuta hyung's birthday, Taeyong hyung is thinking of making all the hyungs sleep on the 5th floor so no one will bother you two."

Mark blushes and coughs up at the implied utterance, "Oh my god, Hyuck! Stop it!"

"Stop freaking out. We had heard way too many moans and creaking of the bed."

He would have counterpart Donghyuck with another denial, but he was too tired to deny it when he knows it's true. So he just flipped the younger a finger and pulled off an annoyed face.

Donghyuck laughed as he looked at his phone, scanning over the social media. "Woah, Yuta hyung is trending!"

Mark smiles up at the exclamation. He always thought about how Yuta deserves all the good things in the world. All the love, the appreciation, because Yuta deserves it.

"Oh, look at this tweet. ' _Who is Nakamoto Yuta for me?_ – _An appreciation thread for the birthday boy, aka the love of my life, aka Nakamoto Yuta.'_ Sounds like a hard-core fan," Donghyuck giggles.

Naturally, it won't bother Mark whenever he saw posts or tweets like that; after all, it's part of their _idol life_. And Nakamoto Yuta is _one fine man_ , who doesn't go staring when they see him? Mark isn't an exception. So the question perks him, stopping him from drinking his water. He didn't know if he wanted to hear the answer, or he wanted to answer it himself.

Much to his dismay, Donghyuck continued. "' _Nakamoto Yuta is my angel. My sunshine, my takoyaki prince, my lion, my Osaka prince, my comforter, my strength, my inspiration and motivation, the one who holds my heart. I love you with all my heart! Have a loveliest birthday uri Yuta-san! I love you, saranghae, aishiteru._ ' Now would you look at that? Our czennies are so cute!" The younger gleefully exclaimed.

But Mark silently scoffs when he heard it. It swarmed him with the pride that no one knows Yuta more than him. Yes, the stated appreciations are just what fans know, but for Mark, Yuta means _more_.

And then, Donghyuck had to go and pulled up the same question on him, but Mark hears a different implication on his tone. He smirks, "So hyung, who is Nakamoto Yuta for you?"

It's not a hard question; out of all, Mark would be the one who could have answered it first. However, there is this fuming feeling in his body – not anger or jealousy – it's more of _claiming_ or _declaring_.

Mark turned to look at Yuta, who is laughing at Taeil's jokes. _God, how can you make a perfect man like him?_ The smile, the ringing laugh, or even how he threw his head back and clutched his stomach as he laughed hard. Mark loves all of it.

Mark loves all that comes with Nakamoto Yuta.

Still staring – more like, eye-dreaming the older, Yuta catches his stare and reciprocates the intensity of the gaze. And Mark felt _loved_ all over. Yuta never failed to make him feel loved, even in just a look from the older. Mark would like to blame it on the beer, on how he blushes and reddens up instantly. To make it more heart-thumping, Yuta dared to wink at him and smile sexily.

Mark wouldn't lie if he said it went straight to his groin that made him feel hot in a second. He shifted his gaze away abruptly, afraid that he'll lose control of himself and place himself on Yuta's lap.

It took him back to the question; _Who is Nakamoto Yuta for Mark Lee?_ He weighs the answer.

First of all, _**Yuta is Mark's boyfriend**_.

Mark clearly remembers it, _August 2, 2018_. His birthday two years ago is when Mark Lee said 'yes' to being Yuta's boyfriend, and he thinks it's the best choice he had taken in his entire life. He reminisces how he cried that night, buried himself on Yuta's chest, and his cracked affirmation; it all sounds terrific for Mark.

It is marked in his mind _forever._

They met in the summer of 2012, and training together, it isn't hard to say that Mark and Yuta will be good friends. Throughout the years, Mark contemplated on the grown feelings he has for Yuta. He wanted to resolve it by getting away from the older, but Mark likes him too much to be separated from him.

It turns out, Yuta is also harboring romantic feelings for him. Mark always thought that Yuta looked at him like a younger brother, nothing more. But when Yuta kissed him swiftly, Mark felt jellified at the combust of returned feelings, and having finally tasted the lips he has spent years staring off. He's not a creep – but he's the only one who could taste Nakamoto Yuta's cherry lips. He ain't giving that to anyone.

But Yuta wanted to court him first. Call it old-fashioned, but for Mark, that is the most romantic thing ever said to him. Suck it up world; they're both romantics. The older never failed to shower him with comfort, hugs, and kisses that kept Mark hot in his toes.

To top all proposals in the world – for Mark Lee – Yuta had taken them out on a night date on a restaurant at the Namsan. Truth be told, Mark argues that they shouldn't, he doesn't want to wake up tomorrow morning with news about him and Yuta having a friendly date when it isn't – it is a romantic date with romantic feelings involved and two people who are intimately loving each other.

But it only took one pout from Yuta, and Mark is taken to a private space of the restaurant. Yuta reassures him no paparazzi, no cameras, their freedom, their time, their lovely celebration. And Mark appreciated that. Being idols, it's hard to keep everything hidden from the cameras; private life ain't a thing anymore for them. So for Yuta to go lengths to be outside, organizing a private place as they looked at the view in the arms of each other, feeding each other, then blowing the candles while wishing for his birthday wish, it brings so delight to Mark.

Then, Yuta had to ask him to be his boyfriend above the city lights and right under the moonlight with unwavering and heartfelt love. Mark would've said yes a million times.

To summarize it all, being with Yuta can make Mark feel like he's on top of the world.

Mark would rather call Yuta his _lover._ Okay, he's into deep meanings and connotations. Mark loves Yuta so much, and no one can change that fact ever.

Second, _**Yuta is an opening door for Mark**_.

Mark is thankful for Yuta, coming into his life and making a constant place on it. Mark needed that.

What he meant as an opening door is that Yuta introduces him to a lot of things and embraces him after everything. Being the much older between the two, Yuta is more accustomed to cruel reality.

Mark had his lowest when he had his gender identity. He was a one-year trainee at that time, and when he finds out that he is looking at Yuta _that way,_ he cried in the bathroom of the building. He has been taught that it's wrong; Mark held on to that ever since he was young.

Coming to another country and manifesting amorous feelings on his same-sex friend, it shook him to the core of his beliefs. Like always, Yuta was the first one to find him, the only one. He pulled Mark into his arms and whispered comforting words. Mark doesn't need to say anything for Yuta to understand, and Yuta doesn't push him to say it either. He just holds Mark right there on the dirty floor because that's what Mark needed.

It took Mark a few months before he mustered up his courage and said his gender crisis to Yuta. Mark remembers not looking at him, avoiding Yuta's eyes, or maybe the judgment that may come after, feeling the impending descent from the older, but what he gets was a very _comforting hug_ and the same confession coming from his lips.

Mark let out tears at that time; he didn't know if it's from the fear or the acceptance he needed from Yuta. He thinks it's both, but he slides more on the positive remark. It helped them become closer; another secret between them holds close, like a silent vow to always look out and protect each other against the unequal world.

Another meaning is that there had come a time where Yuta had become Mark's greatest fear. That opened Mark that he can feel that _immense_ fear, the scary feeling of losing someone. It left a massive void in his heart.

It was the time when after their monthly evaluation as trainees, Mark woke up not seeing Yuta. When he went to their training room, Yuta wasn't also there. He asked the others about his whereabouts, but no one knows. It left Mark chilling and distracted, always looking at the door in the hope that it'll make Yuta appear.

Throughout the day, he didn't saw Yuta. He messaged him, but no replies. He's getting antsy like he has been deprived of the most fantastic feeling in the world – not to mention the growing affection he has for the Japanese. He's worried; he's frantic. He just wants to know where the other was, but he's been devoid of response.

Then, it strikes him with a fear of losing Yuta. The what-if Yuta had back out on their dream, leaving Mark. It shattered Mark's heart as he sobs in front of the older trainees' dorm. He was supposed to knock in, get any information about Yuta from Johnny, Taeyong, Ten, or anyone, _just anyone._

Though, he couldn't even knock when he has been hit with that fear. It felt like he can't take it. He contemplated if he could snatch up some money and fly to Osaka, just to talk to the older again.

His cries were halted when he felt a familiar warmth beside him, and when he looked up, he saw the person he has been missing like crazy. "Hyung!"

He immediately latched himself at Yuta as the other catches him, like always. He was taken aback when Mark started crying at his arms, gripping his jacket tightly, but he holds the younger.

Later that night, as they lay beside each other, Yuta told him that his mom visited, so he didn't train today. Mark punched him playfully as he hugged Yuta, saying to him how he thought Yuta left and how it scared him.

Yuta proceeded to caress his cheeks and the way he looked at him, _lovingly, passionately._ Mark felt the swarming fluttering butterflies in his stomach. His earlier fears turned fascination on the other. And Yuta uttered words Mark Lee will forever hold on.

"I'll never leave you, Mark-yah."

Third, _**Yuta is Mark's stronghold amidst all his problems**_.

Having known each other for years and invading their own's space, they have become each other's cornerstone. They have a lot of similarities, which make Mark drawn towards Yuta.

 _Foreign_. Leaving their native country and stepping on a foreign one in favor of reaching dreams sounds bigger and felt scarier for Mark. If it weren't for his limited Korean, he would have a hard time making his place in the country. Being in a foreign country made it all possible for _homesickness_ to be just around the corner.

Mark has been hit by that a lot of time. Sometimes, he'll call his mom, and just hearing her voice is enough for Mark to cry. Or seeing anything similar to Canada takes him back to nostalgia.

Yeah, he's reaching his dream, but he's quite hurting being away from his family. And he knows Yuta felt that too. But the other argues that while he's just a few hours plane away, Mark's local land is half-way across the world to where he is.

So Mark learned to appease it by being with Yuta. He cried it all out to Yuta, say it all to him; how he misses home, his friends, their dog, everything. Yuta will hug it out of him with a promise of going back there _together_. He made Mark vowed that he'd introduce him to his parents.

Mark didn't know when Yuta became his home, but he's _living_ in it, and he's not _leaving_ at all. He found the perfect home away from his home.

They talk and make promises out of their problems. It's these simple promises that make Mark's heart fly. How caring and how acceptable Yuta is beyond Mark could ever comprehend. He's just so _lovely_. Mark wondered how it felt loving the Nakamoto Yuta. _It must be a blessing_.

Every problem he can share with Yuta, he shares it. It's the same with Yuta. Mark has been his castle against his battles. They are always for each other, and looking at them now, reaching their dreams beside each other, it sounds all too heavenly for Mark.

Problems are nothing when Mark is with Yuta. They promised each other that whatever happens, they'll make it through.

Fourth, _**Yuta is Mark's no. 1 fanboy.** _

The first one who said to him that he's so talented – besides his family – is Yuta. It looked like the older took an instant admiration the moment he has been with Mark.

And Mark's not blind to see it. Yuta always showers him praises and recognition after his rapping practice, dance practice, vocal training, and such. Yuta is still there to tell Mark what are his strengths and his weaknesses. Again, Mark is thankful for that.

What intrigues him the most is, Mark thinks it would stay off-cam. They were taught to keep skinship moderately, but Yuta's awe at Mark's talents is just _Yuta being Yuta_. It's not like they are pretending; instead, the entertainment wants them to look reserved. But it put a smile and made him emit a laugh whenever Yuta would fuss over Mark's skills on-cam. Brings a sense of pride that Yuta is proud of him.

Mark marvels at that. How Yuta sees him like that, how he is always near Mark to cheer him up, to pick him up, to strengthen him more. Somehow, Mark could say that Yuta is part of what he is now. It sounds too deep, but for Mark, it's the truth.

In return, Mark is so stunned at Yuta. The older is much more than what the camera shots, more than what their company posts in their media. For Mark, Yuta is an all-rounder.

Other people don't know hard Yuta practices his vocals, how he started gripping the guitar, or how Yuta is very eager to learn rap from Mark, how good Yuta's cooking, how he can make everyone laugh just by laughing, how artistic the older is, how almost all the members asked him about fashion, how Yuta is so good at comforting others.

Yuta is much more, and Mark thinks the world isn't ready for Yuta because the older is just so out of this world. And it sucks that people don't see that. He hates the company for that, for the mistreatment, the lack of opportunity given. But Yuta would relieve him by saying that he's contented with what he has and sooner, he'll make his own opportunity.

Mark softens, "I'm so proud of you, hyung. I'm your no.1 fan."

Yuta laughed and pressed kisses all-over his face, "More than czennies?"

" _Much more,_ " and he kisses him sweet.

Fifth, _**who is Mark's oppa? Yuta.** _

The endearment started as a joke, but Mark thinks he took it up on a notch, and Yuta's okay with it. The younger had stuck to that name off-cam. He didn't know when _hyung_ turned to _oppa,_ but he couldn't help the bubbly and giggly feeling whenever he says that.

He can be a sneaky little shit for Yuta, tease him on-cam with that name, just because Mark liked seeing Yuta lose his control because of him, made him feel like Yuta wanted him.

Again, saying that in front of the other members is just normal as a humid day, but it is a different thing to say when Mark is pressed on Yuta's sheet and feeling the other's body against him.

Yuta is taking his time ravishing Mark's neck and chest while pumping his cock. "Oh my god – ah! Please, Yuta, need you."

Soon, Yuta has his fingers going in and out his hole, a rhythm along with Mark's moans. God, he felt cloud-nine whenever Yuta is pleasuring and holding him as they made love.

Then, Yuta lines his cock on Mark's hole but didn't push in, which earned him a whine from Mark, who bucks his hips up to press against Yuta. The older smirked and kissed Mark full-square, taking Mark's breath away.

"Say it," Yuta whispered above his lips. And Mark understands what he meant, and he's more than happy to say it.

" _Oppa._ "

That's what it all took for Yuta to push in and bring both of them to the zenith of pleasure. Fucking hell, Mark loves Yuta so much.

So, he didn't know what it took him to push Yuta's limit the one-time he did a voice v-live—saying to the whole world how endearing he calls Yuta by that name. How he whines _oppa_ as he asks Yuta to sing his line from 'From Home' and the sneakiest thing is, people don't see his teasing smiles and flaming eyes, and the reciprocated disbelief look in his lover.

While he took it up on another level, he couldn't deny that he's happy for it. After all, if Yuta punishes him that night, that's for Mark to take pleasure in.

But above the aforementioned descriptions, for Mark, **Yuta is his future**.

When he thinks about it, he can see himself beside no one but Yuta. Mark Lee found his future in the arms of Nakamoto Yuta, which comprises all that Mark is; feelings, dreams, wants, needs, _future_.

And the esthetic comfort he feels every day knowing that he lays it all with Yuta brings Mark to the uttermost happiness he'll ever feel. He knows they are in their 20's, a phase in life where changes are meant to be changed, but in terms of Mark's love, he's contented with what he has for Yuta. Maybe later on, at the right time, at the proper phase, they'll eventually jump into more.

But that's for future Mark and future Yuta to worry about.

He pictures it, once in a while or sometimes it just shows in his mind; them, in the comfort of the studio, writing love songs for the world to listen but they are written for each other.

Mark imagines him laughing with Yuta, maybe in Osaka or in Canada, anywhere. Perhaps they'll buy their own home, have their own space with just the two of them.

It's crazy that Mark thinks about this at the early stage of their relationship, but they're gunning for more, that's for sure. And he knows Yuta felt the same; they shared their dreams together. It warms Mark's heart how it's _both_ of them that is looking forward to whatever the future leads them.

Every single day, his future has always been with Yuta. And he can't wait to spend it with the arms of the other.

_I love you, hyung. I love you. I love you. I love you._

It echoes in his mind, and he needed to let it out, say it to Yuta, because Mark loves him so much, more than what the older imagines.

There is no Mark Lee without a Nakamoto Yuta, and there's no Nakamoto Yuta without Mark Lee.

Donghyuck smirks at the expression Mark is having, " _L_ _ovesick_."

Mark ignored him, his whole mind envelopes as he watches the older smiles, his long hair tucked in behind his ears, the inviting crook of his neck, just the _entire being of Yuta_ drives Mark to stood up and went to the older.

The others glanced a look at him, but he remained at Yuta, then he sat down, facing him. The older reaches up a hand to caress Mark's face. He is looking at him again, the same as always, _i_ _n-love_.

"I love you," he exclaimed out.

It isn't a foreign sound in the dorms anyway, but the way Mark said, with no thoughts at all but how much he adores the older, it envelopes Yuta's heart with love.

"I love you too, Mark-yah."

And then, Mark took the courage to kiss him full in the lips; their friends be damned, he's speaking his heart through the kiss. Yuta was taken aback at first but reciprocated the kiss, sliding his arms at Mark's waist to pull him closer. He can hear the groans and whines of the members but it looks like it is the least of Mark's problem.

He smirks as he pulled away, Mark's lips chasing his. He then stood up, making Mark follows, who clings to him. He turned to them, "Well, that's it for me."

Groans and whistles are thrown at them along with a couple more 'happy birthdays,' and Yuta deemed he'll thank them tomorrow. Right now, he's got a clingy baby lion at his mercy.

"Mark-yah, are you drunk?" He asks, amused, closing the bedroom door.

"No, I'm just –"

"Hmm?" Yuta maneuvered them at the bed, laying down as Mark sprawled at the top of him.

And they both felt at _home_ instantly, seen at how they released a satisfied sigh once they've puzzled together, leaving no space in between.

Mark continued as he buries his face at Yuta's neck, "I'm so happy that I get to celebrate your birthday with you. I like celebrating every birthday with you."

Yuta chuckles as he kisses Mark and the other moans at the ferocity of the kiss. It's all that he ever wanted.

"Me too, baby."

"I love you, Nakamoto Yuta. Happy birthday, hyung."

"Thank you for loving me, Mark. I love you so much."

It was all so serene, in the dark room, in the soft sheets of Yuta, the pillows that smelled like them, at their own space, at the arms of each other, and the love that has always been there between them; Mark doesn't want it to last, and neither does Yuta.

And Mark grew impatient, "Make love to me."

Yuta laughed as it reverberates at the whole room, and it swims at the joy of Mark's heart. He wants to hear that laugh forever.

"Is this your birthday gift to me?"

"Nah, I got a whole new song prepared for you, but you can listen to it tomorrow."

Yuta smiled and kissed the younger, "I'm so in love with you."

Mark giggled as he runs his fingers at Yuta's hair and sweetly smiled, "I love you so much."

They took their time memorizing each other, saying 'I love you' because, for them, it never dies out, sucking kisses and just laying beside each other.

_Every day is a witness of their flowering love, and that's stoned for a lifetime; Mark and Yuta._

It isn't a hard question; Mark can answer it. Although, he now realized that maybe it'll take him an eternity to write all of what Yuta is to him. He'll love to indulge it.

**Author's Note:**

> don't forget to greet yuta a happy birthday!  
> thank you for reading this! ♡♡  
> [twt](https://twitter.com/yuta_aishiteruu)  
> [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/banana_02)


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